Well that is exactly how if feels since i last 'hit' the keyboard of my old faithful laptop.
Yes 'operation' complete and on the road to recovery. And did i time it to coincide with the arrival of the 'British' summer? What do You think? [Purely coincidential! Honest!] It does feel like a 'lifetime' has passed since i walked out of Biketreks [UK] HQ and under went my first experience of 'general anasthetic'. [And i'll have some more of that thank you very much!]

One minute discussing the 'god-given talents of Stevie G, the next waking up 3 hours later feeling like i'd been 'beaten up' outside a Blackpool Club! [first 'hand' experience of that too!] As for the NHS's concept of 'Style' and 'Clothing' during and after an operation? Well that is a whole new crusade for me!Dreadful! Thank the Style gods for American Apperal and some magic potions from Kiehls!

Anyway back on the Fylde coast and recovering...wont be long now! I reckon back on duty before the Bank holiday weekend! With the 'enforced' R&R [one] tries to do all the things [one] is supposed to copybook style. Like,read a book. [ i started a recommended book only to reach p105 and realise i had no empathy with the central character...a complete'prat'!...so i reverted to type and 'revised' my beloved Esquire magazines...again! Actually, recent 'Esquire' there is an extract from a superb novel called 'Gods Own Country' by Ross Raisin [published by Viking] which reads like a 'Lake District' version of 'American Psycho'*..brilliant! Not out in paperback for a couple of months but order your copy now!

Even 'grappled' with a 'Self Help' title but come on, no hope there! London 'recovery' was a possiblity but the 'Paul Smith' weekender simply too much with this season's 'keyhole surgery' look.

Once i'd worked through my over-active brain,i'd do if i won the Lotto...easy! £7.3million is the figure i need and NW3 would be my home.... i turned to the 'What if there was a fire'?.... H'mm not so easy....

A beautiful Joseph menswear ltalian leather belt with brass military buckle,a dear friend bought me about 8 years ago in the Joseph Fulham store,would be up there as would my recently purchased '2nd hand' Prada loafers [50quid!]. Then the difficulties would begin: with flames licking around myankles... dramatic e'h?... i'd be grabbing armfuls of 'Esquire', Wallpaper*, Monocle & Hommes Vogue magazines. The result of which i'd have to 'rescued' by Lancashire's Fire Services finest...or is that something i really should not be sharing with You in this column? I blame the anaesthic!

This got me to thinking that in so many cases the 'thing' that many of You would 'save from the fire' would be your Bike. I can think of at least one Blur LT that would be dragged from the smouldering ruins of a flat in Wandsworth and a 'shiny' new Scott Addict from a terrace in Kendal before anything else. And that is just for starters! Add the countless Orange P7's and Yeti 575's.... i swear girlfriends & pets would 'fry like a Mcdonalds' should it be bike or them!

It's so obvious that bikes become integral ..almost part of your 'genetic' makeup. Let's face it some of your most memorable and life affirming experiences have been shared with your bike. Better than sex? That's for you to decide!

I'd like to think that any memory or image You may carry with You [at all times] of your Blur, Addict, P7, 575 or whatever features prominently a superb, stylish, technically brilliant attire in the shape of clothing & footwear purchased from The Biketreks 'Boutique'? Well no self-respecting aficionado would be seen without! It is summer after all and those 'o'h so last year' styles and colours simply will not 'cut the muster'!

Phil our 'sexy' new style guru and all round genius is on call to help guide You to make the right choice, so much so that when the 'mythical' 'flames of hell coming knocking it wont only be the Blur...etc.. etc.. you'll want to save but the 'perfectly formed 'capsule collection'of Biketeks finest labels too!


PS. Massive, heartfelt Thank You to All of You who have been in contact during my 'recession' to enquiry as to my welfare...really, really appreciated! Thank You so much..... Hope to see You All very soon!

[* American Psycho' by Brett Easton Ellis...a modern day classic! And 80's parody of greed and avarice wrapped up in a litany of 'designer labels' and money..... and no i didn't lift that description from a website! That's all mine!]